Dating double standard

In dating or attempting to date, I find the following to be my pet peeves with guys:

  • A fun text exchange that suddenly ends without the other person saying something like “later”
  • Constantly asking if they’ve upset me or if I’m mad at them
  • Being aloof like they’re too cool or busy to talk
  • Going out with or stringing along me or someone else because they “need it” rather than because they like them

All of these items have happened to me. I hate that guys do it.

But I recently realized, hey do so girls. And by girls….I mean me.

(The second bullet does not apply here.)

Oh the painful reality check.

Now, I feel a little twinge of guilt every time I complain about this because I feel like I should say, “well turns out I’m a coward and do the same thing.”

There was a guy I was talking to for a little bit, who will be referred to as Emoticon Guy (it’s a step up from wellie fetish guy). Emoticon Guy was nice, sweet and talkative, but I knew I wasn’t really interested in him. But that didn’t stop me from stringing him a long a little bit without feeling an inch of remorse. He was persistent (I like that usually) but ultimately, I knew I just did not want to make out with him or even…make the time to hang out with him. I would rather hang out with my friends.

And rather than be an adult and tell him, I just stopped responding to his texts and eventually, he got the message. And when he sent the final text saying “I guess you don’t want to talk anymore…good luck,” I felt like a total asshole. In that moment, I was the model of the major thing I hate about dating.

This sounds awful, but immediately after, I thought about the times guys strung me along and disappeared and rather than text back a note that says “yeah I’m sorry,”  I just deleted him from my phone.


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