What makes me reconsider dating

Recently, a friend texted to tell me it was over with the guy she was seeing.

In that moment, I wanted to a) key something valuable to him and b) punch him in the dick.

And then it just made me angry because my next thought was, “again.”

Lately, I’ve noticed an angering and frustrating trend when talking to friends about dating and “relationships.”

They meet a guy, everything is great, puppies, rainbows and kittens and then, literally overnight, things change. The guy become distant, stops calling/texting or only respond when you initiate, and just slowly starts vanishing from your life. And when questioned, they either say “nothing’s wrong, I’m just in a weird mood,” or “I’m just having an off day,” and then finally, when you’ve asked again (because you don’t know what is going on), they finally tell you what this guy told my friend.

There is no rhyme, reason or trigger, no other girl they’ve hooked up with, or reason why they’ve suddenly changed their mind. One day it just happens and the sweet, funny guy you were seeing has become a cold, distant asshole who suddenly has relationship issues. Or issue he never mentioned before.

And it fucking pisses me off.

Because it’s selfish. And cowardly. And it’s cruel to intentionally treat someone like that.

This trend where guys think that by backing off and stopping the calls/texting/wanting to hang out that women will just “know” you don’t want to see them anymore enrages me.

It’s happened to my friends a lot lately and it happened to me.

My opinion of this is simple: Be a man. Don’t leave her hanging or torture her to make it easier on you. If you were man enough to ask me out, you are man enough to tell me it’s over.

And while my friend knew this is how it would likely end with this guy, it was sad to hear.

I know that women do this too and I’m sure from the guy perspective, it’s just as frustrating. And my feelings about this are the same toward women.

Where both sexes think that running away makes dealing with ending a relationship better, baffles me. Because it doesn’t, and usually, they do it because they’ve been hurt by some asshole guy or selfish girl too. So they pay it forward and do more damage at the same time.

There is no answer or resolution to this post or my frustration. It is what it is. Not all guys may be like this, but it makes me feel more skeptical about dating. If this inevitably where relationships end up right now, what is the point in trying?

Guess that’s the rhetorical end to this soapbox rant.

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