Taking a look at self-compassion
Tuesday night while cruising Twitter, Chickbug posted a link to a New York Times article about self-compassion. Intrigued, I clicked over to it and was nodding my head along with this theory after the first paragraph.
So what is self-compassion? Turns out, it’s pretty simple: it’s how people view themselves. It’s further summarized as “giving ourselves a break and accepting our imperfections.” Um, yeah I’m not so good at that.
The article suggests that people are so supportive and understanding to friends and family but can’t take that and internalize it. We beat ourselves up over mistakes at work, overdoing it on calories, etc. and can’t cut ourselves a break.
Seriously, New York Times GET OUT OF MY HEAD.
Researchers feel that people don’t embrace self-compassion because the line between this and self-indulgent is very thin and that criticizing themselves keeps them in line.
This is a theory I definitely need to subscribe to. I am my own worst critic. This week, I made a mistake at work and rather than say, “I made a mistake, it’ll be okay,” I beat myself up over it, furious that I was so irresponsible (being overdramatic) and thus, binging a bit on candy because I was upset, so I ate my feelings.
And according to the article, self-compassion can have an affect on individual weight loss and diet plans. After reading the article and thinking back to Tuesday, there might be some truth to that.
Now, this is just one article, one set of research and one point of view, but what I take away from this is something I need to tattoo on my arm: cut yourself some slack.
I am very supportive and understanding with others, it’s time to really turn that on myself. I beat myself up over the big and small things, making it personal and making it a huge deal when really, I’m human. It’s okay to feel disappointed and want to change something in hindsight, but rather than dwell, it’s time to say, “I’ll do better next time” and move on.
I think I need to write this mantra down and put it in my wallet because this could be tough.
What about you? Are you your own worst critic?